BE BETTER

This is going to be the most hater thing you ever heard me say, so I’mma go ahead and accept the fact that I’m hating today

when I came down those steps and saw another suitor in your face, I wanted to reach back to when we were together and swing from that place but I had to let dude be because I already was out on bond for a open case

I walked real close hoping you told him something I did and he wanted to defend your honor, I was fully prepared to smack his lips back in time to go look for Sarah Conner

Then I realized two things in that one instance, I guess I am childish and kind of understood why you didn’t want to go the distance, I damn near cried that night but we were deep so I resisted

When I got to the house I rolled a stocking stuffer, looked in the mirror and said you had one job mother fucker, that’s when the plan started formulating, in the beginning I was horrible pretty much just emulating, over the years I’ve stepped into my own, now I understand the importance of protecting that throne, don’t be like me go ahead and fix it now, because one day you might find yourself in your emotions sounding like Drake in front of a crowd

#LEXICONKILLER


TRUTH OR DARE

When I got bigger than the bullies I became leader of the pack, you whip one kid ass and they see you not going for that, I had kids that used to beat me up breaking in hostess trucks for snacks, power rush..  I think I’m addicted to that

I was beard gang at 15 years old, I used to walk into U-totem to get my beer because it was cold, I used to get my Newports from 7-Eleven though and my XXX magazines, at this point I was trying to show grown ladies moves they never seen

Don’t blame the clerk’s or the women, whoever remember I kept gold coins to go swimming, but what had more effect were those every other weekend visits dwindling, plus relations at 12 gave me the confidence of any man to pick my vices off the shelf, balcony at school I’m such a good planner, that’s the day I became the Hulk and erased Bruce Banner.. virginity story if you’re a slow understander

A lot of the stuff I write you have to read slow and listen fast, more than likely if you don’t understand I’m using an analogy about sex crime or cash, 6 out of 10 times if it’s heartfelt than you know the situation and know I’m not chasing any clout just anticipation, the other four times I’m probably in the 5th dimension wondering about a black owned plantation

#LEXICONKILLER



OH

I used to be brutally honest but then you turn me into a liar, I fell in love with you but pimp juice wasn’t ready to retire, I had a stable full I was a V12 raging bull, they were gullwing but not doors; I’m trying to say I was running through whores, but I had a princess at home who was strong as lumber I told them about you before I even got a phone number, I think that made them want me even more, I was five letters away from a perfect alphabet score yeah LMNOP fell like in 03; but I always told them the truth because I cared about you, and the first time they said anythingΒ  disrespectful we were through, oh ok yeah I think I get it now that I said it out loud, the crazy thing is I started writing this proud, and now I’m doubting whether or not I should even give it to the crowd


VIRGINIA IS FOR LOVERS

Thank you for taking time out of your day to read my thoughts ✍🏾✍🏾✍🏾

DRUGZ..  how many of us need them??  DRUGZ… How many of us use them?? .. DRUGZ… How many of us need them?? Let’s be real

Everybody has a vice, some are accepted and some make people look twice, some roll up to forget and be at ease, some pop pills and blame it on their knees, one time I talked to a dude that huffed freon, I just listened as he told me about the high he on

Some break out the skis and go on holiday, not Christmas but Doc they act erratic in a way, others travel with a tourniquet and have to tie off to get their blast, if they aspirate this will be their last

Some people argue whether or not this one should qualify, but it has to be a drug if you keep drinking after your first D.U.I, you can chalk it up as just having too much fun, but it has to be a drug at least when you catch your second one, you figured it out so now you only drink at home, only problem is you drove everyone away so now you’re all alone

Not to leave anyone out we got the hardest working on the list, sell their daughters laptop for ten minutes worth of bliss, can fix the engine on everything from a 72 Impala to a Rolls-Royce wraith, swear on his mama grave and he was with her yesterday, come on baby I got you when my check come on payday, needless to say a week later he got the beats by Dre

DRUGZ..  how many of us need them??  DRUGZ… How many of us use them?? .. DRUGZ… How many of us need them?? Let’s be real

CEE NOVA DICHOTOMY

Hi my name is Nova; I’m addicted to everything, red bones, money phones, indica and sleeping alone

Hi my name is Nova; I’m addicted to everything, attention whore, jewelery store, couple cars, we need more

Hi my name in Nova I’m addicted to everything, fresh out Riverside regional ready to let my nuts hang, gotta a girl that say she love me and imma try my best, but I’m addicted to double D’s on every girls chest

Hi my name is Nova a certified problem, I get this guy into all kind of conundrums sit back and see if he can solve em

Hi my name is Cee; I’m addicted to everything my family, my son, sativa, the peace it bring

Hi my name is Cee; I’m addicted to everything mental health, mental wealth and memories on a shelf

Hi my name is Cee, and I gotta fix everything grandiose asshole did, I had to use all of his money to fight to see our kid, Hi my name is Cee, I’m a proud black father, I refuse to raise another Nova I’m shooting for a road scholar, a Titan of industry or artist like me, I will bend reality to manifest his destiny

Hi my name is Cee I’m a reformed womanizer, I had to go through hell to become a black love realiser, Hi my name is Cee and I played with a lot of hearts, it’s one in particular I have to fix that I tore apart, Hi my name is Cee I’m on a mission for redemption I came from the bottom bear witness to my ascension

LET IT LONE

Let it lone time to turn the page go to the hobby store and buy you some sage, let the pain dissipate, in the fuk shit you don’t have to participate, take that energy and transform it into a tangible entity, the universe will place everything at your feet you don’t have to search for chemistry, it’s easy to lose yourself replaying prior events when you do that you welcome memories of nonsense, I’m not just speaking from an outside view, believe it or not I’ve played the fool a time or two, I’m just trying to give you the cheat code for everything I’ve been through, remember I’ve survived a terrorist and her insurgent crew

VIRGINIA VENOM

She was born in a small town that she couldn’t wait to get from around

Every man she ever met left her with regrets and she left them with memories they could never forget

Well educated and her family expected the best but she had to find something else to quench the fire in her chest

I love you was the spell that unlocked her inner fears the only time she felt human is when she shed tears

Pain equalled love in her warped universe she never truly believed that a man could put her first

It hurts so good everytime she was proven right she never stayed untill the morning she left with the night

A dream started a sequence of events in that dream she saw a man that made her want to repent

To her surprise he really existed she had to get him she persisted

Victory would be hers no matter what the cost she didn’t realize by chasing him she would be lost

Something she could love that came from her was the ultimate goal neither of them had any idea of the things that were to unfold

A conversation over dinner with the guise of it being a friend he told her if it was him it would definitely end

From that moment she felt he would never accept who she truly was and he had to be destroyed just because

Unbenounced to him he was sleeping with the enemy but now she had something to love he thought would be a remedy

Selfish with her love she snatched it back fast every kind word she ever said was left in the past

The three they were turned into two the only words spoken were fuk you

Virginia Venom left his heart compromised if you ever met her this would come as no surprise

I KNOW RIGHT

Everything I love seems to leave so when I fall in love I start to grieve

Won’t be long now before something I previously did resurfaces; before the love came I was kind of an asshole for all intents and purposes

The things I said before I don’t mean now but the things I said before were so mean and so foul when they cross my mind I’M like WOW

I’ve only seen one relationship make it, so if I saw a chance to stray I would take it, shoot my shot one hand in the air, my jerseys forever in the rafters it’s right there

Plus the odds are we’re not going to last forever, so the feeling of having to make up for lost time I want to feel never, double edge sword I seal my own fate because I feel like it’s already written, when I share this theory the rebuttal is always you gotta be bullshitin

When I fall in love I start to grieve because everything I love I force to leave then I banish everything I love to happy memories on my sleeve and I can look down and smile in times like these

RANDOM THOUGHTS FROM YA BOY

“It’s easy to always take a woman’s side if you’ve never bared witness to what happens when estrogen and adrenaline collide”~ya boy πŸ’₯πŸ’₯πŸ’₯πŸ’₯