IF ONLY

This is one from my book Poems from the trap volume 1. I don’t always talk about nefarious activities, it gets emotional too, but don’t get it twisted

Give me one more chance and I’ll write all my wrongs, give me one more chance and I’ll write you a song

I’ll tell the world that you are my universe, I’ll tell the stars that you cum first

You can look at my sleeves & see tattoo tears, If you look in my eyes you’ll see a lot of regret and wishing you were here

I been working my way back to you
I’m six two but my soul grew and my common sense too

Y’all come first over everything in existence, It was a revolution and I didn’t miss it

Black love is the most beautiful on Earth and a black woman is the mother of birth

No blessings will come to me until I do right by you, and I pray I can fall asleep every night next to you

Dear higher power please hear my words, I came back from the edge to be what they deserve

#LEXICONKILLER


HIGHER POWER

No matter how cold the night may seem, don’t give up the serpent of old is trying to implement his scheme
He’ll put people in your life to make you second guess, the first one in hell trying to make you a permanent guest

It’ll be plenty of bumps on the road to glory, your life is a book it’s up to you to tell the story, cry every now and then to release the  pain, you’re an angel so your tears would be heavenly rain

Never give up always fight to the end, just intertwine your fingers when you need a friend, when it’s all said and done and you write the last chapter in your book, I’ll be waiting at the gates, we always knew you had what it took

PROTAGONISTIC VICTIM STANCE

She likes dope boys so you never really had a chance she let you get close because she still wanted romance, I think it bothers her because neither will ever be what the other need, only reason I know is because she tells me when we’re smoking weed

Yeah she smoke too and roll like she grew up in Cuba… sideline, was she in the band because her lips move like she playing a tuba; nevermind T.M.I. here I am talking crazy when you’re about to cry

You seem like a nice guy so this is what I’mma do, I’ll block her and I’ll block you too so that way you won’t get drunk one night in your feelings and your call come through, try to save both of us from something we probably don’t want to do

No hard feelings I totally get your position bruh, this the first time you stuck to your intuition huh, imma do you one better and disappear, now I’m depending on you to make her not reappear

#LEXICONKILLER




LIGHT HEADED

Beware of any man that calls himself a king, especially if there is no evidence to be seen, how did you earn your crown and on what battleground, was it hereditary succession or is it time for a confession, do you really deserve the title or is it unprovable like scriptures from the Bible, does the monarchy really exist and for the record a King understands all of this, a great leader lays it all on the line to protect his people, but the line I see behind you is full of sheeple, beware of any man that calls himself king, especially if there is no evidence to be seen

TRUTH OR DARE

When I got bigger than the bullies I became leader of the pack, you whip one kid ass and they see you not going for that, I had kids that used to beat me up breaking in hostess trucks for snacks, power rush..  I think I’m addicted to that

I was beard gang at 15 years old, I used to walk into U-totem to get my beer because it was cold, I used to get my Newports from 7-Eleven though and my XXX magazines, at this point I was trying to show grown ladies moves they never seen

Don’t blame the clerk’s or the women, whoever remember I kept gold coins to go swimming, but what had more effect were those every other weekend visits dwindling, plus relations at 12 gave me the confidence of any man to pick my vices off the shelf, balcony at school I’m such a good planner, that’s the day I became the Hulk and erased Bruce Banner.. virginity story if you’re a slow understander

A lot of the stuff I write you have to read slow and listen fast, more than likely if you don’t understand I’m using an analogy about sex crime or cash, 6 out of 10 times if it’s heartfelt than you know the situation and know I’m not chasing any clout just anticipation, the other four times I’m probably in the 5th dimension wondering about a black owned plantation

#LEXICONKILLER



OH

I used to be brutally honest but then you turn me into a liar, I fell in love with you but pimp juice wasn’t ready to retire, I had a stable full I was a V12 raging bull, they were gullwing but not doors; I’m trying to say I was running through whores, but I had a princess at home who was strong as lumber I told them about you before I even got a phone number, I think that made them want me even more, I was five letters away from a perfect alphabet score yeah LMNOP fell like in 03; but I always told them the truth because I cared about you, and the first time they said anythingย  disrespectful we were through, oh ok yeah I think I get it now that I said it out loud, the crazy thing is I started writing this proud, and now I’m doubting whether or not I should even give it to the crowd


LEXICON KILLER

My mind drifts and wonders like Stevie when he’s trying to ponder what lies on the other side of darkness out yonder

Conversations on a constant loop perfect form ready for a shot to shoot is it a new script or a reboot it’s a reality show not the goof troop

If I said it then I mean it but I have a tendency to change my mind so if I said it I meant it at that particular time but the future has a tendency of making my thoughts rewind

Coulda shoulda woulda is the wave that I ride it’s a damn shame I took myself through hell for a man to arrive karma is funny because you had to leave for me to be alive I never would have changed if you stayed passive by my side you killed the relationship but I survived through the smoke you can see the Phoenix rise



A HUNDO

I know I love her but I’m starting to doubt myself, see she has four kids; the biggest reason why I put the proposal on the shelf

I know I’m ready to be the man she needs me to be, but I’m not sure if I’m ready to have a whole family, that’s a huge responsibility to take on when I only have one, hell I can’t propose now I’m in a custody battle thats not even done

Plus you don’t understand my child’s mama, if she found out I was taking on four kids she would blow like Osama, another reason why I doubt myself is she gets included in everything, even a conversation with myself about buying you a ring

I’m not sure if I could stand the temptation of not trying to right wrongs from my past, and your kids deserve more than to be in a rotating cast, I do love her enough to know she deserves to be happy forever, but I’m not sure if I wont go when I get that call to put the fam back together

TEDDY BEAR ๐Ÿงธ

It’s been a lot of Thanksgiving since You’ve been gone, but this one hurts especially bad because it’s been too long, too long for reconciliation, too long for a phone call anticipation, the worse part about it is I actually changed, you’d be surprised, black love dominates every part of my body, down to my big vein, if you gave me 8 minutes and 28 seconds I could explain, you wouldn’t even have to hear my voice, until it was up to you, your choice, it’s much easier to communicate without text messages or in boxes, those things usually come back up and make for interesting paradoxes, I heard you saw my mans and them and not one question, I had to ask if it look like you were stressed and I heard so guess you still you you want me to tell the truth or you want me to spare your insidesย  ? because really she look better than that girl that I saw you with outside, so yeah I guess you still you, but enough about me and the things I put you through, how’s my little superhero ? Still dominating on the court ? Still making goals? We made an all sport, well this was kind of long for a letter with no address, anyway Happy Thanksgiving God bless