YEARLY CHECK-UPS

My world stop turning when you died I was in a room with like ten choppers but like a baby I cried
I got myself together and started returning phone calls mad as hell because it was no way to get revenge at all
You closed your eyes with plans for the morning who in the hell would have imagined we would be in mourning
I swear I didn’t want to ring your doorbell when I saw your wife face it was straight hell
Your babies lost their daddy and my selfish ass thinking about myself
I gotta hold it together even though I wish it was me I gotta stay strong in front of the crew because if not you know what the wolves gonna do
I got your wife and I promise I won’t try to hit her she got my real number I’m on it no slumber
I’mma play your role in your babies life I’ll walk em down the isle and approve the dude before there a wife
I ain’t taking ya sons hunting though I’mma try my best to keep them away from guns just like I do my son make sure they don’t be like us to get their loot my job is to keep them out of situations to shoot
Other than that I guess it’s business as usual tell them guys don’t feel a way I just hate funerals plus they still living through my stories and I think about them everyday we really never really die so we can finish this that day

IM STILL A “TANK” 8 YEARS LATER FROM A MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS DIAGNOSIS AND A RAYNAUD’S PHENOMENON (ALWAYS KNEW I WAS SPECIAL LOL) DIAGNOSIS IN 2003 WANNA KNOW WHY 🤔 YEARLY PHYSICALS AND EARLY DETECTION IMMA LET YOU IN ON A SECRET REAL ONES GET SICK TOO

WHY BLACK MEN DON’T CHEAT

I knew we weren’t gonna make it from the go
How much I was gonna fall in love with you is what I didn’t know
I tried to leave a thousand times but when I got to the door memories clouded my mind

Really all our first and I asked myself is it me that changed & am I making things worse

I mean I don’t cheat anymore but I guess that’s not enough I respect our relationship but you make it rough
I do so many about faces I feel like a soldier and you act like you don’t understand I’m a black man with the world on my shoulder
I’m putting my clothes back in the dresser here I stand a dedicated father and man no lesser I’m trying to fight to save my family I want to be a father but not absently

WILL YOU

There she goes my willendorf with that Golden Glow you may be from Venus but you are my Earth I’m not sure if you were created or your mom gave birth either way you are a sight to behold the first time I saw you I almost passed out cold you walked up to me and said you look familiar do I know you? yeah I’m the guy that has a future to show you it’s been years and you still do that same giggle I told you that night I could solve the riddle and when you walk away I still get hypnotized by that wiggle you are my partner and some times the CEO like I said my willendorf there she goes

PHOENIX

You must have seen my new lady, guess that’s why all of a sudden you hate me, I do admit you all do favor, but baby is a way sweeter flavor The energy shift in my chakras from then to now is like clean energy compared to Chernobyl, I thank God everyday I got mobile, and got out the fallout zone, you know the place we used to call home Now I pay attention to the flowers as they bloom, I wake in the morning excited for noon, that’s usually when baby and I meet for lunch, & if we gotta make it quick we just do brunch, I thank you for releasing your hold, I thank you for returning my soul, I thank you for never changing who you really were, if not for that I may not have ever met her If it makes it easier we can blame it on me, but I’m sure your past victims know it was you & not me, who knows & who doesn’t I’m so far beyond caring, that’s the number one reason why my soul I’m bearing I mourned the death of our Union far too long, I think I wrote 100 songs, when I was on 101 the wise man in my head said what are you doing son, for the first time I listened I stop reminiscing, & that allowed me to see her glistening The heavens opened up, it’s karma not luck, even though sometimes I was a jerk, I never intended for your feelings to hurt, really I think I explained too much, just know I let it burn like my Dutch

PIMP OR DIE

I have a stalker that I love, I should be in church but I’m in the club, I think the attention is like a drug to my self confidence, yeah I know that’s supposed to be autonomous, whenever I need to feel love or get lost in the moment, I know you are down because you’re my biggest proponent, I act like I’m not interested to see how far you let me take it, then you turn on the charm and to myself I say might don’t make it, once again I wake up next to my number one fan, it’s been seven years & don’t ask me because I still don’t understand, maybe I don’t have a stalker I’m just seeing competitive spirit, or maybe I’m in a relationship but refuse to endear it

LET ME BE GREAT

Just let me be great, no matter what the outcome no matter what the Fate, I played the rules on both sides of the table, one is dangerous and the other a fable, potential has always been my gift and curse, a double-edged sword I been carrying since birth, I know I’m smarter than a lot of things that I do, but good intentions never fed my child how about you?? It’s a gray area in life and I straddle the fence, no matter how far you are on either side make sure you have money for legal defense, a lot of times it takes more to stay free than what you making, but you can’t show up with a public defender unless you’re faking, in that case conspiracy is easier to prove, I know cats doing years for zero units moved, I’m evolving thinking more like sibling dividends, so we can meet in the Hamptons on random weekends, talk about life what it’s about & how far we’ve come from seeing the doubt, oh word you just got a boat?? I just bought a chopper, not the 47 but the one that fly through traffic like a 96 Impala, life is great we’ve come a long way, kids got businesses and multiple properties to stay, the vision got inspired by some things that transpired that ultimately lit my fire, I realized it’s a marathon & I’m too young to retire I got a name to carry on before I retire

#LEXICONKILLER

A LOVERS REMORSE

It’s been a long week I really don’t feel the need to have to speak but you know what I’m going through and I know your situation too I just wanna get lost in your soul like we use to do a deep tissue massage maybe smoke one or two then we would do what grown folks do If it was so bad why do thoughts of you bring me so much peace & if it’s so wrong than why can’t I let you go & be free I can’t because I belong to you & you were made for me I told you I was coming back I just needed to find the man in me so I could be the man you needed I just thought you knew everything else you superseded so when I heard you were getting married I couldn’t believe it Yet here we are with a million memories & miles apart & on top of that I have to deal with someone else stealing your heart I knew you first & nurtured your dreams now its turned into a nightmare as it seems I want more than just your body I want you to be my sensei & I’ll be your karate I know the big days coming up & you look beautiful in that dress but sometimes people have buyers remorse when they say yes

WHAT SHE MEANS TO ME-MALE MASCULINITY

I’m sorry for ever calling you a bitch, especially when it was usually a argument about something I did & you asked me to switch
I had it confused I didn’t know your significance to this Earth now I know you came & come first
I had to walk through the fire & confront my own demons but it was too late when I woke up & realized I was dreaming

You were gone & you took everything good that was in me I was misogynistic but that’s all that I knew how to be you were truly the best thing that ever happened to me
Im ashamed of the amount of disrespect I displayed you are the temple that should be on display not only do I want to hold your hand but I want you to see me become a better man I’ll lay my life down to protect your crown and as long as I succeed I’ll rest in piece in the ground

I really feel like the black woman is my God and savior if I had Mansa Musa gold it wouldn’t be enough to pay you I owe you every breath in my body & every beat of my heart I have a lot of repenting to do so today I’ll start

I should have never called you out of your name I should have never made you a unwilling participant in my games I should have never projected my insecurities on to you now that I’m wiser I realize that was the coward thing to do I should have never intertwined my soul with another woman and come home to you transferring those spirits is a dangerous thing to do

I’m sure you’ll read this & think of the things I left out but I hope when you read it you’ll see now what I’m about the disrespect stops here & anyone who continues should feel fear you are my Queen & will be treated as such I am your soldier any insurgents that dare to touch will bow at your feet when I put the in the Cobra clutch I love you so much