THINKING OUT LOUD

I stay alive for a living, every morning my eyes open is Thanksgiving, when I go to sleep I’m fighting to beat the night, if my conscious mind comes back I got another chance to make it write, I got another chance to make these words flow, I got another chance to come up with a combination and syllable count to make your mind blow, I’m out here creating literary gymnastics, look back at my catalog I spit that super fantastic, that get back break up, I hate you make up, a womanizers wake up, trying to teach these kids how to get that cake up, I been nice I just been keeping it a secret, everything I right is between me and you and that’s how I want to keep it

EMOTIONAL SUICIDE 💔

This rainy weather has me wondering what to do, I swear I’m out here talking like it’s just me and you

My muse is my monster that I created from nights I should have just masturbated

Nights I could have just come home lonely, but it was damn near impossible with all these females on me

I gave in to temptation like a sodomite, two eights make a sixteen and they down to dyke

Instances like that tipped the scale, or when I would be verbally abusive coming home ripped as hell

You can go ahead and leave this is not an abduction, have you ever seen someone’s eyes turn to hate from seduction ?

Those tears turned into laughter and the more she pulled away the more I ran after but I was never fast enough to recapture

The closest I’ve come is love letters and apologies, oh and Poems from The Trap Vol. 1 the anthology

VIRGINIA IS FOR LOVERS

Thank you for taking time out of your day to read my thoughts ✍🏾✍🏾✍🏾

DRUGZ.. how many of us need them?? DRUGZ… How many of us use them?? .. DRUGZ… How many of us need them?? Let’s be real

Everybody has a vice, some are accepted and some make people look twice, some roll up to forget and be at ease, some pop pills and blame it on their knees, one time I talked to a dude that huffed freon, I just listened as he told me about the high he on

Some break out the skis and go on holiday, not Christmas but Doc they act erratic in a way, others travel with a tourniquet and have to tie off to get their blast, if they aspirate this will be their last

Some people argue whether or not this one should qualify, but it has to be a drug if you keep drinking after your first D.U.I, you can chalk it up as just having too much fun, but it has to be a drug at least when you catch your second one, you figured it out so now you only drink at home, only problem is you drove everyone away so now you’re all alone

Not to leave anyone out we got the hardest working on the list, sell their daughters laptop for ten minutes worth of bliss, can fix the engine on everything from a 72 Impala to a Rolls-Royce wraith, swear on his mama grave and he was with her yesterday, come on baby I got you when my check come on payday, needless to say a week later he got the beats by Dre

DRUGZ.. how many of us need them?? DRUGZ… How many of us use them?? .. DRUGZ… How many of us need them?? Let’s be real

CEE NOVA DICHOTOMY

Hi my name is Nova; I’m addicted to everything, red bones, money phones, indica and sleeping alone

Hi my name is Nova; I’m addicted to everything, attention whore, jewelery store, couple cars, we need more

Hi my name in Nova I’m addicted to everything, fresh out Riverside regional ready to let my nuts hang, gotta a girl that say she love me and imma try my best, but I’m addicted to double D’s on every girls chest

Hi my name is Nova a certified problem, I get this guy into all kind of conundrums sit back and see if he can solve em

Hi my name is Cee; I’m addicted to everything my family, my son, sativa, the peace it bring

Hi my name is Cee; I’m addicted to everything mental health, mental wealth and memories on a shelf

Hi my name is Cee, and I gotta fix everything grandiose asshole did, I had to use all of his money to fight to see our kid, Hi my name is Cee, I’m a proud black father, I refuse to raise another Nova I’m shooting for a road scholar, a Titan of industry or artist like me, I will bend reality to manifest his destiny

Hi my name is Cee I’m a reformed womanizer, I had to go through hell to become a black love realiser, Hi my name is Cee and I played with a lot of hearts, it’s one in particular I have to fix that I tore apart, Hi my name is Cee I’m on a mission for redemption I came from the bottom bear witness to my ascension

THE STOP: LIFE & TIMES OF YA BOY (PART 2)

So I’m in the backseat handcuffs on my wrist, I can still feel em everytime I think about this

At this point I’m getting compliments about my choice of firearm and how it could defeat the armor they had on, I’m like yeah unfortunately that’s gonna be about the eighth one gone, everytime this happen y’all take one bruh, so I’m guessing my baby eagle gone huh

I just got out from my second one, three months later I catch my third, I’m still on probation for the second one; yeah this is absurd, on to booking we go, if they give me a bond it’ll be high because of my other case, lucky for me I got enough in my pocket to get me, fuk face

Hear the clink in the morning then the bright lights, I’m about to go in front of the monitor and roll the dice, come on hard six not trying to take a cold shower for lice, got a lecture then he put twenty on my head, that’s cool I got over two in property like I previously said

First phonecall I know this number by heart, it’s a dub I got the ten in property go ahead and make the paperwork start, oh and call to see if you can catch my car, they were being difficult said they were taking it out far

Finally twelve hours later I’m back in control, returning missed calls telling a copy of a story I already told, Khalid before Khalid another one, same folks same jurisdiction; this should be fun

UNDERTONE

I have an affinity for red women that harbor aggression, I find them to be teachers of life’s lessons, forks in the road at certain intersections, a road map of no certain direction a constant source of mental erections, forget the heart on your sleeve you need a blood pressure monitor I think your blood is boiling because you’re red as a thermometer, expressions don’t get held well, in my mind I can literally hear you telling me to go to hell, I can read your face that’s why I know the right response, give me a second and I’ll say something that came out the Renaissance, the path of least resistance, the road I travel with persistence, I’m trying to save you so you can save us, come tell me your desires and hush that fuss, I have an affinity for red women that harbor aggression, you don’t have to ask consider this my confession

I KNOW RIGHT

Everything I love seems to leave so when I fall in love I start to grieve

Won’t be long now before something I previously did resurfaces; before the love came I was kind of an asshole for all intents and purposes

The things I said before I don’t mean now but the things I said before were so mean and so foul when they cross my mind I’M like WOW

I’ve only seen one relationship make it, so if I saw a chance to stray I would take it, shoot my shot one hand in the air, my jerseys forever in the rafters it’s right there

Plus the odds are we’re not going to last forever, so the feeling of having to make up for lost time I want to feel never, double edge sword I seal my own fate because I feel like it’s already written, when I share this theory the rebuttal is always you gotta be bullshitin

When I fall in love I start to grieve because everything I love I force to leave then I banish everything I love to happy memories on my sleeve and I can look down and smile in times like these

SEROTONIN

Any ole local joker can conquer the flesh, I want your mind put me in between the happiness and stress, I already know I can make your body tremble, something like a drum stick when it hits a cymbal
We can talk all night no problem with Cee, I’ll even hold you as we fall asleep, wake up and do it all over again, before you get the business; I gotta know you’re all in, I need to know what that mind do, I need to know the demons we fighting before they find you
You ever had your mind massaged and stroked? You ever felt euphoria from words being spoke? You ever look beyond the here and now? You ever heard a voice so melodic it made you smile?
If I can’t make you better what are we even doing, if I can’t make you better why would I even be pursuing, yeah gift of gab made the spit game super magnificent, when it comes to matters of the mind it is omnipotent
Let those souls connect like Bluetooth, I can feel your vibe that’s enough proof, think about me magically your phone rings, I’m on my way do you need me to bring anything, I’m not the first to explore your body, but I do want to be the first to make your mind my hobby